First Taste

Sara has REALLY been going after any food I eat lately, so today I let
her taste a pickle (got that idea from Susan). And she LOVED it!!! She
kept reaching out and putting it back in her mouth to suck on it
whenever I'd take it away. Pretty soon she was drooling green. :-) She
was going after it so much I was afraid she'd break a piece off, so I
had to take it away, but it sure was cute!

Comforts

Sara loves to snuggle into our down comforter. She's definitely Annie's grandbaby. :-) Too bad for her it's getting warm and the comforter is going in the closet...

Easter

Easter this year was so cold! It was in the 20s when we left the house Easter morning, so naturally, Sara couldn't wear her original Easter dress. Instead she wore this one that is just as cute, even if it was a little bit big. :-) And her cute "trumpett" socks look like little shoes. Those were a present from her Aunt Willow. Who needs Easter bunnies when you have cute babies!

Rolling Over

I caught it on camera today. Here's Sara rolling over (or should I say, falling over!) :-) It's hard to keep her on her tummy these days! She rolls over pretty much every time I put her on her belly.

Reactions

We discovered today that Sara is allergic to goat milk.  She's been getting about 6-8 oz. per day consistently for about 2 weeks now.  I had noticed first of all that she seemed extra "gassy" and fussy with it.  Also, she's had a very persistent diaper rash that hasn't healed even though I've been slathering the creams on it!  I didn't make the connection, but Mom saw it today and said that it was the kind of rash babies get when they've eaten something they're allergic to.  And since the only other thing she eats is breastmilk (which she's had from day one!), it must be the goat milk.  And just in the last day since cutting the goat milk, her rash is already getting much better.  So, I guess the supplementing will have to go back to formula.

One day, Two milestones

Last night, Sara slept in her crib all night for the first time (she usually sleeps in her bassinet, or even with us).  She did wake up a couple of times, but I was able to pat her back and she fell right back asleep.  And I actually think that wasn't because of the crib, but because of her stuffy nose.

And just now, she laughed for the first time!  I was chewing on her cheek like I do sometimes, and she started laughing!  So I kept doing it, and she kept laughing.  Babies sure are fun.  :-)

Sniffles

Poor Sara has her first real cold.  I got one earlier this week, so she probably got it from me.  She's coughing and has a runny nose, and she was up every hour last night, and I think it was probably a sore throat waking her up (since that came with my cold too).  I guess there is a first time for everything.

More today...

The lactation consultant today said that she's pretty sure Sara needs to see an occupational therapist to train her to suck right. She discussed Sara's "case" with the LC from Willow Creek, who agreed. She said it's definitely a tongue problem that is holding her back. She also sent me home with a baby scale so I can weigh Sara before and after every feeding for 24 hours or so, just so we can get a better idea of how much she really is getting. She said that seeing a baby with problems like this is not that unusual -- except that they usually figure it out within a week or two! It is unusual for a baby to still be having such issues at four months old (honestly, I think it's probably just that it's uncommon for mothers of babies with these issues to still be breastfeeding, so you don't see older babies with these problems). She is very supportive of course, but she did ask me how I would feel if breastfeeding doesn't work out, which makes me wonder if she's not more pessimistic than she seemed. So, for the next 24 hours, I'll be weighing Sara before and after feedings. After that, I'll send Susan (the LC) the information, and we'll go from there!

4 Months Old!

I'm astonished as I look at the title of this post and realize that it's my baby that is four months old! It certainly has been a trip...

One thing that I can say about Sara is that she sleeps great! She's on a pretty consistent routine (when we're home), where she likes to get a good nap in the morning (about 2-3 hours), and a couple more 1-1.5 hour naps throughout the day. She then goes to bed for the night around 6:30pm. I wake her up between 9:30 and 10:30 to give her one last feeding, and then she usually sleeps until 5:30 or 6:00am. She'll take another feeding then and then go back to bed until 9:30 or 10:00. It's amazing how consistent she is when there's nothing to disrupt the schedule. And the best part is that we've mastered naptime where I can just put her down and she'll go to sleep on her own. It was definitely a long road getting there, but well worth it. Originally, I had to walk or nurse her to sleep and then gingerly put her down. At first, she would wake up pretty quickly (after 30 minutes or so), but she eventually got used to being in bed by herself and would sleep for longer and longer stretches. Then I started putting her down just when she'd be going to sleep and lie down with her and hold her hands until she was asleep. And now, she loves her bed so much that (if she's not overtired!) she sometimes actually sighs with contentment when I put her down and goes right to sleep! I know the feeling. :-) In some ways it's backfired a little bit though, because she usually doesn't sleep more than 30-45 minutes when I hold her now, which makes it very difficult when we're out for long periods of time. And actually, when I say "her bed," I should really say our bed. For now, she's still with me and Zack. My goal right now is to get her taking naps in her crib (she's actually been doing that for the past 2 days)...

...and then phase her into her crib at night. I'm not really sure if I'm going to be okay with that or not (I think I'll miss her at night!), but she's starting to get so squirmy in her sleep that I end up on the edge of the bed every night. So I guess we'll see what happens.

Still no laughing yet! She often looks as though she might rip one, but just gurgling and cooing for now. :-) She smiles just about anytime you smile at her (provided she's not cranky), and she's starting to consciously reach out and grab things. Before, she was just swinging her arms aimlessly, occasionally hitting objects, but now you can see her focus on something and actually reach out for it, and then grab on. And then, when she accomplishes her goal, she starts kicking with excitement. She's also much more interested in her hands than ever before. She can spend fifteen minutes just examining them!

She sure is cute! It would seem that her first nickname is "Critter." Zack calls her this pretty consistently, and it's even led to other phrases like, "It's Critter time!" and "You've been Crittered!" With Zack as her daddy I'm sure she'll have many more (and hopefully more feminine!).

I get more attached to her every day. Zack is really great about watching her for an hour (or three) and letting me go do errands or have fun, but it's amazing to me that as much as I want and need to get away, I always end up missing her still! I guess that's the way God intended it. :-)

Another day, another appointment

Sara and I went to see another lactation consultant this morning.  As of right now, she gets about 6-8 oz. per day of goat milk, with the rest of her nutrition from breastfeeding.  We're still having some pretty major issues.  The LC we saw this morning was Susan McWilliams, an IBCLC at Family Medical Center in Fayetteville.  She was referred to me by Abby Creech, who worked as a translator for her for several years.  She is a super nice lady, and definitely wants to help and seemed very knowledgeable.  She confirmed what the ENT, Dr. Cashman, said, that Sara is most definitely not tongue-tied, but that she does have a short tongue and short palette (not really sure what that means), and that she also has a "disorganized suck."  Now that she's seen Sara, she wants to think about a game plan tonight and wants us to come back tomorrow.  At that time, she'll also be loaning me a baby scale so that I can weigh Sara before and after feedings to see how much she's getting.  I have lots of hope still that this can work.  Maybe this is finally the end of our loooong road!!

Like Papa, like Critter

She's real cute! She's eating some goat milk now that we've accessed some through Aunt Tooty's friend, Audrey, who gives it to us for free. This last batch smells like a sweaty animal, and took some getting used to, but she appears to have become accustomed to it. In fact, I think she adjusted about the same speed as Papa... at first I didn't know if I could even keep it down... gradually though, its repulsive powers weakened with each bowl of cereal. Same thing happened for her, minus the cereal.

To get her to smile, go up to her and say inquisitively, "Love your Papa?????" I think she likes that word "Papa."

The schedule Lauren's got her on is really great- she's sleeping a lot, and is way more predictable as far as her moods.

What a sleeper!

I'm so grateful that Sara is sleeping well these days.  Last night (after a very long day...), she slept NINE hours!  And it was in her bassinet, which was even greater, since that meant Zack and I got to stretch out a little bit and not be so cramped.  It's amazing how such a little bitty person can take up so much room.  She's such a squirmer that when she sleeps with us, it never fails -- one of us ends up almost off the bed with her pressed right up against us.  ...which is sweet but not very practical long-term.  : )  Her naps are great too -- when we're home.  This week has been tough on her because our church had the Discipleship Conference and we were there from 1:00ish to 9:00pm every day.  I'm sure she'll be glad to be home today!  (I know I am...)

Feeding update

In this case, no news is not good news! Unfortunately, we have no more answers on Sara's feeding issues. Abby and Carla are trying to get me in touch with a lactation consultant that they are good friends with, so I'm hoping this will help. I'm pretty much giving up hope that Sara will ever be exclusively breastfed though. This past week we were able to obtain some raw goat milk from a friend of Zack's aunt, and Sara seems to be taking to it pretty well (though I'm wondering if it's actually hurting her tummy some... she seems to be extra gassy these past few days).

I figure I've done just about everything I can to make this happen, and if it doesn't end up working out, at least she was able to nurse for the first few months, which is the most crucial time. Who could have figured it'd be THIS hard!!!

Here is Sara trying out goat milk for the first time. :)

Hidden Feature

For those of you who have never noticed, on the right side of the blog under "Other Places," there is a link that says "Sara - Week by Week (A Timeline in Pictures)." Every Monday I've posted a picture (or two!) of Sara that week, so it's easy to see how she's changed over time!

Sara in Black & White

Click on the image to go to a slideshow

Clueless

We're still searching for answers to Sara's feeding problem.  Jessica Ballinger suggested some tongue "exercises" that might help, but I just feel like I'm shooting in the dark!  The most frustrating part is just that we can't figure out the problem.  I was telling Mom the other day that I just feel so helpless because other moms at least have the peace of mind of knowing that their baby is full and happy.  I never know that.  Even when Sara isn't screaming, I can't be sure that she's actually full.  The fact remains that without supplementing, she still only gains about 2 oz / week.  (She should gain about 1/2 lb per week!)

 

I've been going to practice for a play that I'm in and leaving Sara at home with Zack.  It's been working out great!  My practice starts at 7:00, and so far, she's slept the entire time I've been gone.  Boy, he has it easy. :)

Discouraging News...

Well, it's not tongue tie... We just left Dr. Cashman's office, and he said he didn't want to do the procedure because her tongue wasn't restricted enough. Back to square one!

You've Been Crittered!!!

On one hand I can't wait for her to get a little bigger so I can start playing with her more, but I'm also enjoying "the now." She's cute! Unfortunately our organic baby formula upsets her stomach - the other stuff is designed to be more digestible, but hopefully in a few days we'll be back to nature.

I give Lauren nasty-tasting vitamins every day, that hopefully will help Sara acquire a taste for good stuff that most kids don't like. If food is quality, I want her to grow up to like it - if she does, I can say from personal experience that it will be one of her favorite gifts. It's a gift to be able to find great pleasure in a wide variety of foods - a gift that can be cultivated, mind you, and more easily developed at the beginning than at mid-life. Plus, the more you enjoy things, the more thankful you stand to be. At my family's tables, we always rave about good food and how thankful and blessed we are to have it, and I want to give her a chance to enjoy it as much as a lot of her ancestors do :) Nasty-tasting pills for Lauren are the first step... I hope! (Fortunately you can swallow them whole :)

Lauren's being great with her.

3 Months Old!

Boy, I wasn’t sure we’d make it this far. :-) I think “roller coaster” is too mild a phrase for the up and down we’ve been on. I had no idea it could be so difficult just to keep a little baby alive. Some days I feel like that’s all I do. With all of Sara’s feeding and weight problems, it’s been more than a full-time job just to keep her full. I remember early on, in the first few weeks, feeling like there was something wrong with either me or my baby because I just couldn’t make her happy it seemed like – she seemed to always need to eat. It was probably 10 weeks before we realized that the problem was just that, even though she was nursing constantly, she wasn’t getting full. She was screaming because she was hungry! It was so sad to see her, fifteen minutes after eating, lying there screaming, clawing at her face, and chewing on her fist. At that point, I knew I couldn’t let her go on like that, so I decided we’d give her some formula. Just giving her 2-4 ounces per day has made the difference in her gaining from a couple of ounces a week, to a pound every two weeks.

We’re still working on the tongue tie thing. We went to the MD on Monday that Carla recommended, who referred us on to Dr. Cashman, an ENT, who will evaluate her on Thursday to see if she is truly a good candidate for clipping. We’re finally reaching the end of this long process! I can’t believe it’s taken three months to discover the problem, one that’s fairly common even. And the pediatrician, though kind, was no help. He and the lactation consultant there simply wanted to make sure Sara was gaining weight, and as long as she was, they didn’t seem to really care if it was from breastfeeding or not. And the staff was actually unfriendly. So we don’t plan to go back. The most help I’ve gotten was from the La Leche League, and from Jessica’s sister-in-law (through Jessica). The leader of the LLL is Kathy Freeman, the lactation consultant at Washington Regional, and she’s the one who actually “diagnosed” Sara with tongue tie. She was extremely kind and just wanted to help us, whatever it took.

But it certainly has not been all trials! She’s nine pounds now, so she’s getting stronger, and when she hit that magic 8-pound mark, she started sleeping through the night. I went from getting 1-2 hours of sleep at a time to getting 7-8 hours a time – literally overnight. She now sleeps from about 10:00 p.m. to 5:00 a.m. every night, sometimes even more. And she smiles! God certainly knew what He was doing when He made babies. He makes their cries so horrible that you are willing to drop what you are doing and do whatever it takes to make it stop, and He makes their smiles so sweet that you forget about the hard stuff. And He makes them so cute and cuddly that they’re sure to get held a lot! It’s so fun when I come back in the room where she is and get down to smile at her and talk to her, and she starts grinning and kicking and waving her arms with excitement. Sometimes when I’m talking to her and she’s looking up at me, grinning and watching my face intently, and trying out little baby noises in return, my eyes get teary because it amazes me how much I love her. I’m quite sure that “ah-goo” means “I love you, Mama!” :-)

Even though she’s small, she’s not behind on any of her milestones. Her first “social” smile was at 6 weeks, and now at 3 months, she’s already rolled over 3 times. No laughing yet, but I can tell she’s close. Zack and I sure do love her like crazy! It’s hard to think back and remember what it was like before her, even though it was such a short time ago in the grand scheme of things. Our lives are definitely changed and not our own anymore, but we’re already excited to see who God will add to our family in the future!

Sleep!

For the past 10 nights or so, Sara has slept through the night -- at least 5 hours at a time, and most nights around 7 hours (last night was 8)! I'm hoping this lasts. :)